Finding a good roommate can feel like finding a needle in a haystack, but our guide can help you
Looking for a roommate is a high-stakes game. There are so many factors in roommate compatibility that the task can sometimes feel insurmountable. To help narrow down the field of potential roommates, consider asking candidates the following questions to determine if that person could be your new best friend or if they’ll be a co-living nightmare.
A roommate interview is just as important as a job interview, so use these questions to find out whether you’re compatible with a potential roommate.
A major factor in finding a roomie that you’ll get along with is determining whether you have compatible schedules. Some people prefer to work opposite hours as their roommate so they have minimal interaction with them, while others want to find someone who also wants to spend evenings at home together.
Shared and equitable cleaning is a big part of a roommate relationship. If you’re a tidy person, you want to avoid moving in with someone who only does the dishes when the fruit flies show up. Asking a potential roommate about their cleaning habits, and being honest about your own, can cut down on a lot of stress down the road. Talk with your potential roomie about whether they’d be willing to follow a shared cleaning schedule to ensure that chores are shared and not just one person is carrying the bulk of the cleaning.
One perk of having a roommate is having a partner to split your home maintenance tasks. Ask your potential roommate how they typically handle the work that goes into maintaining a home—everything from changing light bulbs and switching furnace filters to mowing the lawn and raking the leaves. You can also ask your potential roommate to tell you about a maintenance issue that arose in their last home, and take note of how they handled it.
It’s important to make sure both you and your roommate are on the same page about who is responsible for what maintenance tasks, especially since neglecting them could result in damage to the home, decreased property value, or loss of rental security deposits.
Working from home is more popular than ever, so it’s important to learn whether your roommate will be home during your work-from-home hours and vice versa. Working from home is already full of distractions— from a neighbor blaring their TV to your cat demanding more pets—so ensuring that your work-from-home schedules mesh can remove a potential stressor.
If your potential roommate also works from home, then you should establish who will work in what part of the home beforehand, especially if there’s not enough space for two home offices.
If you aren’t a smoker and would rather not live with a roommate who smokes, you should establish that preference upfront. Likewise, if you smoke inside your home, your potential roommate needs to know that so they can decide how to proceed.
Similar to work-from-home schedules, you should ensure that your free time activities mesh well (or at least don’t clash) with your roommate’s. If you prefer to sleep in on the weekends, it could be a problem if your roommate likes to get up early and blast music. Also, if you prefer quiet weekend nights on the sofa but your roommate is the type to bring the after-party home, it could cause problems down the line.
Cooking and cleaning after cooking is a dynamic that roommates need to work out in advance. For example, will one person cook for everyone? Will you split days? Are you each responsible for providing your meals? If you smooth out these details before moving day, it will make the transition to roommates even easier.
From a blanket on the sofa to a favorite mug, sharing each other’s things is a situation that every set of roommates handles differently. If there are off-limits items, both parties should establish that fact prior to living together. On the other hand, if a potential roommate refuses to share anything, including kitchen appliances or cleaning products, that may be a red flag.
If you have a food allergy, it’s essential to find a roommate that respects your dietary restrictions and won't risk putting you in a possibly dangerous situation. When meeting with a potential roommate, ensure that they understand the specifics of your allergy, and how that will affect the types of food or other products that cannot be in the shared spaces.
If you have a pet, or plan to adopt one in the future, that will impact your roommate search. Conversely, if you can’t stand dogs, you’ll be miserable with a roommate who has a four-legged best friend.
To ensure that any four-legged roommates are well-received, try to arrange to meet the pets before making any commitments. And if you both have pets, they must have a few nose-to-nose meetings in the home to determine how they get along. You don’t want to find out that your roommate’s dog isn’t housebroken or continuously chases your cat after signing the lease. Laying out ground rules, like no dogs on the sofa or no cats on the dining room table, is important in making sure the relationships work for everyone, pets included.
Frequent overnight guests are a strain on the shared utility bills, so find out if your potential roommate has a significant other who plans to spend a lot of time in your home. A roommate’s partner who spends more time at your house than your roommate could prove problematic, so set a few ground rules beforehand.
Is the significant other allowed to be there when your roommate isn’t? Should they chip in for utilities if they spend the night for more than half the month? Save yourself from future awkward conversations by ironing out these issues before moving in together.
Many people look for new roommates because their living situations changed, not necessarily because they had a negative roommate experience. However, if your potential roommate does nothing but complain about their past roommate experiences, it might be time to move on to the next candidate. Ideally, you should look for someone who seems to mirror the roommate relationship that you’re looking for and who doesn’t have many cohabitation horror stories.
If your roommate candidate doesn’t have a steady income or has spending habits that make it difficult for them to make rent, that’s a red flag. You should consider asking candidates to provide contact information for previous roommates or landlords to ask whether they were prompt in paying their rent.
Another key ground rule to establish between roommates is how and when you can invite friends into shared spaces of the home. For example, do you need to give each other a heads up before inviting people over? If so, how far in advance?
If you host your weekly book club on Saturday mornings, be firm about reserving the living room during those hours. Similarly, if your roommate works from home every Thursday evening, it’s respectful not to host a dinner party that night.
Finding a roommate starts with a few basic searches. These tried and true ways to find potential roommate candidates, some old school and some online, can help you narrow the pool of contenders.
Recommendation from a mutual friend: Friends and family are great go-to’s for compatible roommate suggestions.
Roommate finder websites: There are a ton of online roommate finder services, so create a profile that includes your ideal roommate qualifications, rent details, and photos of the available space to get started.
Search for roommates on social media: Use the power of your social media connections to find a great match.
